I have sadly been struck by the ‘I am a pants writer’ disease. It has nibbled away at me for a few days before erupting into the full blown disease.
I have hidden away from this blog, I have hardly tweeted and i have only had short bursts of writing interjected with taking one daughter or the other to the GP, parents evenings and general household necessities.
Why is it that some days I feel I have a story to tell, emotions to explore and characters to create, and other days, I feel an empty darkness pervading my soul that prevents me from putting pen to paper or fingers to keyboard.
It’s not writers block – the characters live and play in my head most days – and I’m not clinically depressed, I just find waiting for agents to say yes or no hard at times. The longer the time goes on the easier it gets I suppose, but even ease can fluctuate.
The odd tweet about this has seen me receive sweet words from people on Twitter so I know I’m not alone in suffering from this malicious syndrome – but malady in numbers doesn’t feel less painful.
I went to a comedy club last weekend and Arthur Smith said that I was too kind, hence I’ll not always get what I want – does he know something I don’t?
I have a couple of competition pieces in the pipeline if I can put words to quill.
Fellow writers and bloggers – what do you do in times like these? I had a hot cross bun with jam and clotted cream which I suppose helped as I’ve written this!
Happy Word Flow One & All
4 thoughts on “When the confidence goes – what to do?”
I nap. A good and restful sleep can often put things into perspective. I spend a day or two wallowing, reading, playing games and eating rubbish food and just generally goof off until it passes. Then I nap some more 😉
Or I often find that the self doubt niggles away until I get really quite antsy and peeved then sit stubbornly at the computer and write to prove the horrid disease wrong.
I like many of your methods to overcome this annoying misery.
I think you are right about resting and leaving things alone or a while.
I revisted a piece for a competiton today and realised that there were still improvements to make, which I quite enjoyed doing – I'm easing myself back slowly 🙂
Thanks for your comments, it's good to share the highs and the lows of the bizarre world of writing.
I thought you'd gone a bit quiet – you're right of course, malady in numbers doesn't feel less painful, but the fact remains that everybody feels like you feel at some point. If you're seeking your validation as a writer from agents, then it's always going to be beyond your control – you may not get an agent for this book at all, you may not get one for the next book either, but the one after that? Who knows. And even if you get an agent, will you get published? My point is, you have to set your own goals, your own means of validating what you do, you have to keep reading, keep writing, keep improving your craft and your voice – set your own standards, and hit them, and if a publishing deal comes along? – big deal, you're doing this for you and will do it publishing deal or no.
I'm not suggesting you ignore what the industry is doing, or what your readers want, but producing fiction is a lonely business, and while you're doing that, it's your world and your rules.
Failing that, chocolate always works.
Bless your heart dear James, you're right of course.
I write for my own pleasure – it keeps me sane, god knows what I'd be like if I didn't.
Only one friend knows what I do and I'm sure the others think I lead a dull life – but it's far from dull, only i can't tell them!
My current WIP feels much better all round due to studying the craft, but I may still not get an agent – but it's not the end of the world as you put it so well – there is always chocolate 🙂